Are you just waiting to be found out?
Do you ever feel like a fraud? Just waiting to be found out! Waiting for that tap on your shoulder shouting'Gottcha!' even though you have had success, genuine success and you absolutely know what you are doing (well most of the time!)
Sounds like you might have a case of Imposter Syndrome and that is a real thing!
Imposter Syndrome can show up when you are least expecting it, or you might suffer from it regularly and it's just getting in your way of achieving what you want and know you really can. Good news it's not a diagosable mental illness, it is a term applied to intelligence and achievement and links to perfectionism. Those experienceing Imposter Syndrome can also experience anxiety and even dpression so it's good to know it is sortable.
Psychologists Pauline Rose Clance and Suzanne Imes, first used this term in the 1970's. Imposter Syndrome shows up as feelings of self doubt and incompetence despite experience, accomplishments or education standards.
Great news though if this sounds like you .. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
70% of successful people reported experiencing imposter feelings at some point in their life
75% of executive women say they have experienced it
80% of CEOs feel out of depth in their role
84% of entrepreneurs and small business owners report experiencing imposter syndrome.
[Reported by Dr Valerie Young 2022 Imposter Syndrome Institute]
Five Types of Imposter Syndrome [Research by Dr Valerie Young]
The Perfectionist Type
They focus on the 'how' something is done, how things turn out. If there is one imperfection anywhere in the how, that is the focus. 99% is not good enough.
The Expert Type
Their focus is on 'what' or how much they know or what or how much they can do. So not knowing something brings failure and they certianly don't feel like an expert.
The Soloist Type
They care abou the 'who''. Who completes the task.? They believe they should know everything and needing any help in the way of coaching, mentoring or similar is a sign of weakness and failure.
The Natural Genius Type
Their beliefs around being able to do something the first time. If they can't do that they are not intelligent enough, competent enough, smart enough and this leads to a feeling of failure. Competence for this type sits around ease and speed of being able to achieve it at the first attempt.
The Superhuman Type
Competence here comes from 'how many' roles they can juggle and excel at, at any one time. Falling short in any role evokes feeligns of failure given they should be able handle it all, perfectly and with ease.
So how do you know if you've got it?
Ask yourself these questions ..
Do you get worked up over the smallest mistake or keep revisiting a piece of work as it's just not good enough yet?
When you thinnk of your own succes to date, do you think it is becasue of some outside factor or luck that was there just at the right moment?
Do you find even constructive criticim really hard to handle? ( said in the right way of course)
Are you waiting to be found out as a fraud?
Do you downplay your own expertise, even when you are genuinely more skilled than others?
If you said yes to any .. then you might just be experiencing Imposter Syndrome.
So what is it costing you?
Over working and over preparing ... you are never done. You may lose clients as things take too long.
Procrastinating over important projects and tasks, so your own work/life balance doesn't happen
Not pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, so not allowing your own personal or business growth
Not developing new ideas, new products or if you do - not getting them out there.
Casuing yourself needless stress, wasted time and avoidable crisis points
Burnout!
For those with Imposter Syndrome, doing something right doesn't actually help to change those beliefs that started the Imposter challenge in the first place. It's gone right this time .. must be the result of luck! Right?
There are lots of reasons why many of us ( and yes I have had it too) struggle with Imposter Syndrome, on occassion or more regularly. It can be from past experiences, family upbringing, social anxiety, particular personality traits. Many of the clients I work with experience it and we can work through it.
Here are some tips to help with Imposter Syndrome
Share how you are feeling. Talk to somone you trust. Beliefs that are irrational do tend to fester when they are hidden and not talked about.
Journal about what beliefs you hold about yourself. If you see yourself procrastinating over a task, ask your self what is happening for me right now.. journal your thoughts ( yes with a pen and paper)
Collate emails, letters/cards of recommendations from satisfied clients and make a trophy board. Keep it where you can see it and look at it when you recognise that you are doubting yourself. [Decide if you trust these people or if they just make stuff up to be nice . all of them that is [I do know which you will decide].
Know and start to act on the belief that good is good enough. It doesn't have to be perfect. Commit to a deadline and stick to it. Do your best. Check for accuracy and that is it.
Stop any comparisonitis between you and others - you cannot be anyone else. You are you. They are taken. Avoid lots of time on social media ... not everything on there is true!
Refuse to let these feelings of not good enough, being a fraud, not as great a XYZ stop you from achieving your goals. Keep going and choose to ignore that inner voice.
Let your guard down and let the people around you see the real you
Here's the thing though - to feel like an imposter you must have had some success even if you have already decided it was down purely to luck. Reflect on what you have achieved and be grateful for it.
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